Dear Future Self:
Should you happen to find Tom Waits bowling in the next lane again, I implore you…lay off the beer. Give yourself time to come up with a witty but politely non-intrusive ‘hey there Tom’ and sing a riff of 16 Shells from a Ten-ought Ball. Or maybe ask him if bowlers in Minneapolis send Christmas cards too.
Whatever you do or however it is phrased, please refrain from telling him you use his music for cooking ambience…and, should the urge strike to give him a simultaneous bro pat on the shoulder, just keep eating your cheese sticks.